bicarb and lemon juice

Standing for the Greens in the local election; waiting for the results. My life might be about to change; trouble is that though I'm utterly passionate about the environmental cause and have always done a lot of campaigning, I quite like my life as is (though a little more paid work wouldn't go amiss). I'm also anxious about being entangled in the grinding gears of political machinery, as I said the other day.

While I wait, I thought I'd pass on a little wisdom. This is a result of being about to engage in a minor round of housekeeping, and that is due to the fact that tomorrow I have my poetry group meeting here. The Man gently points out in a slightly hurt way that it would be nice if I wanted to clean for us, not the group – and we both know that that's both challengingly un-pc, and there's some truth in it (he does more than I do). I meanly counter by pointing out that I get up early to make his sandwiches - and how unfeminist is that? - But it's caring - and he acknowledges it.

Anyway, here are my housekeeping tips for you. You will notice that as energy-savers they are quite green.

• If you wear glasses, remove them before cleaning; if you don't, try wearing dark glasses. There! Doesn't it look much better already?
• Don't bother about cleaning if you're alone, or in company
• Don't wash your home-grown leeks too carefully - that way you'll save on expensive dietary mineral supplements, and if your friends don't like the grit you'll save on cooking for them too (they won't take you up on the invites)
• As my mother used to say: Better a house uncleaned than a life unlived (and there's some poignancy in that)
• There's nothing that can't be solved by a little bicarb and lemon juice. Or by going away.

There. Don't say I never give you any useful info. Back to biting my nails. And not cleaning.